XVIII

Firstly I thought
I was
fine; mmmmmmm Secondly, I thought
mmmmmmmmmll all was
mmmmmmmmmll fine; mmmmmmmml Thirdly, I discovered
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmlll I was
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmlll not.
She is
still a perturbing
figure, mmmmmlll But not
mmmmmmmmmll as she used
mmmmmmmmmll to, mmmmmmmmm No, not
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmlll anymore, at least
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmlll now.
Seeing
her provokes
me a desire, mmll A
mmmmmmmmmll feeling that
mmmmmmmmmll I thought sincere, ml Humble,
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmlll as she
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmlll asked me yesterday.
I cannot stand
them
walking around, ll Kissing each other
mmmmmmmmmll as
mmmmmmmmmll tender lovers, mmm Caressing each other
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmlll as
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmlll new-wed lovers.
The visions
are
killing me slowly,l Perhaps they
mmmmmmmmmll are
mmmmmmmmmll too much slow mmll Perhaps I
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmlll was
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmlll too much slow.
More
than ever I
am nothing; mmlll More
mmmmmmmmmll than ever it's
mmmmmmmmmll destroying me; mmll More
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmlll than ever I
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmlll need emptiness.